It’s just me.

yesterday was really my virgin binge drinking.. a flaming lambo, long island tea, vodka, bourbon coke mix. but who could’ve resisted free alcohol?.. so i ended up puking longer than i should be at the dance floor. got totally wasted! damn.. so that’s my ORD night.

seriously, how time flies! it feels like enlistment wasn’t really that long ago and then i’m already done with NS. it’s as if i’s just flipping the pages of a chapter instead of writing it. y’know living that kind of life was so carefree when i didn’t have to worry about consequences.. it’s a bit like going to a school without exams. Aw.. i’m so going to miss the folks there. but i seriously won’t miss work! lol. actually, i think i’d been very lucky to be privileged, and i’m just very grateful for the fact. well i’m back in the real world now.

by the way, my ic smells damn good! Ha ha ha.

我的天空，为什么有乌云。。 风，为何还不把它吹走。。

have you really been that busy, that you don’t even have time to reply my sms? i just feel like, you know, i’m being used, like, i’m only visible to you whenever you’re in need of something. and for the saddest part, it seems as if you’re taking me for granted, without even a word of gratitude. it’s not that i expect anything in return, i’m definitely not trying to mean that you’re being selfish and ungrateful or anything like that, but, the feeling you’re giving is as such, you know? and i hate to feel that i’m being treated this way, like i’m just a side, a thing that you can just chuck when you have no need of it. i’m not obliged to always try to be understanding, to tolerate, do favours, but i’ve been doing anyway, because i really want to be there for you, and these are things that just show how far i’d go to sustain our friendship, and i just hope that you’d do the same…

i think i screwed up the usp interview today. had a very bad brain freeze.. haha. heck, doesn’t really matter if i get in anyway. maybe it’s better that i don’t.

practically spent the whole of yesterday wasting time away. unbelievable! i’d to wait 4 hrs just to shake hands with the chief of arty.. wtf! if not for CO i’d have just disappeared. yea, i’ve got him to thank for the nomination as well as that impossible appraisal.. and many more things.

one more week to ORD. and i still haven’t found a job. there’s an opening for a Temp Architecture Assistant. i’m pinning my hopes on that one already!!

it’s just incredible. it seemed as if the world was turning against her, but she never gave up hope. i felt her optimism towards herself and the world that has been so mean to her is exactly what she sings. honestly, i’s so deeply affected.

tanya’s 纪念 has been playing over and over for the past hour, but i just can’t get sick listening to it. hah.. it’s making me a little emotional though. but i really love this song.

quite unexpectedly, i’m going to receive yet another award. it’s the chief of arty award. sounds prestigious, but  i’ve honestly no idea what that is, even less, on why i’m getting it in the first place. lol. apparently co had submitted my nomination. haha, i thot his reply to the email was rather interesting. i loosely quote: “congrats! you’re all deserving recipients.. or i won’t have spent the time writing your nominations. come and see me if you want to know why you are getting the award.” i think i should really go see him soon, lest he made a mistake. the other people concerned here are khairul and rsm, by the by.

next up, another piece of good news! usp phoned me up last monday to arrange for an interview =) yay. i’m glad the profs didn’t puke all over the screen after reading my essay. so the day will be 2 saturdays from now. i really hope i can get in.

anw i’s with oke and pillai at the health screening at UHC. then there’s this doctor with a pretty strange demeanor. haha but he’s really quite funny in his own way… as for the real joke of the day, the story goes roughly like this: the board had blinked my queue number, so i hurried over to the corresponding ‘counter 2′ thinking i’s at the right place. but then i found myself trying to explain why i’s there, at the same time struggling to make sense why they don’t understand what i’s there for. lol. turned out, i was to be at ‘room 2′ for a review instead, which, now that i think of it, makes absolute sense. but by the time i realised this, i’d already succeeded turning myself into the silliest fool. worse still, 1 minute had passed. so sensing the urgency, silly fool dashed in the direction of the rooms, frantically looking around to locate the right one but just couldn’t find it, until a lady sitting on the sofa nearby pointed to the back quite matter-of-factly.  “er, room 2 is over there.”

it’s been 2 days since the application deadline for usp was up. admittedly i can’t really get the worry off my mind, whether my essay will be making those profs reading it cringe in disgust and consequently develop a puking fit.. so i figure writing it down may help. haha. but there really isn’t much to worry about yeah? what’s done can’t be undone right. so in order to make life easier i shall subject my fate or rather theirs to destiny.